We lost something precious this week. I barely had time to understand just how precious it was. The physical pain of the event hasn’t quite subsided and acts as a constant reminder. The pregnancy, though it was 7 weeks, feels like a distant day – a beautiful dream that came to an end too quickly.
After a couple of days of storms and cold rain, the sun finally returned today – blue sky, light breeze. I finally ventured out into the yard in the sweatpants I’ve been wearing all week. Our roses are still in bloom – amazing. There was one rose that particularly intrigued me. It was so new, so pure – so innocent. It smelled fresh. I had to take a picture of it.
The rose now hangs in our house – sort of as a memorial to our baby. When it dries, I’ll do something special with the rose. Press it into a bookmark or something. It will be a reminder that life is full of beautiful things that are often overlooked. But God is aware of every detail – every small event. And He is perfect in His care. It’s breathtaking to think that God knows His creation so intimately.
And until we’re face to face with Him, we’ll never know why He allowed us to encounter such momentary joy and then, suddenly, such an enduring grief. But until then, what we do know is this:
“He determines the number of the stars;
He gives to them all their names.
Great is our God, and abundant in power,
His understanding is beyond measure.”
-Ps. 147:4-5
“The Lord is near to the brokenhearted,
and saves the crushed in spirit.”
-Ps. 34:18
That’s the God we serve. The world may not be right, but God is good.
